Bad Phonecall

Dov Weinman


Over the phone she’s non-stop
about the weather, 
her kid’s shit grades in math,
and how they’re not allowed
to have any lawn ornaments
in their neighborhood. 
I reply with
yeah El Nino, its been hot,
does he study at all? 

and so, no garden gnomes?
I want to yell into my end
that this must be the slowest
possible way to die, 
talking to her
about nothing. 
Instead I write it down
on a piece of scratch paper,
adding cuss words for
my own happiness.
I think to myself,
don’t lose any more friends
and as I finish this thought,
she says, quietly, 
my mom has breast cancer.
I’m terrible over the phone
and I say,
what about Halloween?
she pauses, What?
Can you at least put stuff on
your lawn during Halloween?



Dov Weinman is a mountain-poet, ultrarunner, activist, chicken caretaker, and calls both Oregon and Montana home. His poetry has been published in the Whitefish Review, Poetica Magazine, Portland Review and other publications. Dov received a M.S. in environmental studies from the University of Montana and is now a Peace Corps Volunteer for coastal resource management in the Philippines.

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